More phrases that I find annoying (from an interoffice email):
"...please can you get in touch by return."
Issue #1: "Return" is not a form of communication that I'm familiar with. Perhaps it's akin to the carrier pigeon, and has gone extinct.
Issue #2: "please can you get in touch" is sufficient. Simple. Conveys the request.
To sum up: this phrase is both redundant and nonsense. F.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Under/Loaded statement of the day
From the Wikipedia article on Tropic Thunder, Ben Stiller's new movie:
"Owen Wilson was to have Matthew McConaughey's role in the film, but dropped out after his suicide attempt in August 2007."
It's almost like he dropped out because he remembered he had to take the trash out that day. But, you know, not.
"Owen Wilson was to have Matthew McConaughey's role in the film, but dropped out after his suicide attempt in August 2007."
It's almost like he dropped out because he remembered he had to take the trash out that day. But, you know, not.
Return from the Deep
Sorry for my long absence, oh faithful readers. In fact, I simply forgot I had a blog. You know, as you do.
But this tidbit, and a gentle reminder from Em, propelled me to return. From a story on CNN about how some people have used Spore's* Creature Creator** (if you don't understand all the words in that paragraph, you're not as nerdy as I am) has been used for less than innocent pursuits:
"But scrolling through the database -- past the three-legged sea horse, past the seven-eyed wildebeest and the half-motorcycle-half-pig -- revealed something many users didn't expect. Buried among the more wholesome attempts were two-legged dancing testicles, a "giant breast monster" and a four-legged, "phallic fornication machine," for starters."
What confuses me here is the line "something many users didn't expect." I mean, correct me if I'm being cynical, but I sort of assumed that anything that can be used for porn will be. Are these users Mormons? Or pathologically naive?
* Spore is a soon-to-be-released game in which, basically, you get to create your own life form and evolve it from a bacteria to something with a civilization.
** Creature Creator is a side project of Spore, which has been released and whereby people create their own creatures and can share them with the world.
But this tidbit, and a gentle reminder from Em, propelled me to return. From a story on CNN about how some people have used Spore's* Creature Creator** (if you don't understand all the words in that paragraph, you're not as nerdy as I am) has been used for less than innocent pursuits:
"But scrolling through the database -- past the three-legged sea horse, past the seven-eyed wildebeest and the half-motorcycle-half-pig -- revealed something many users didn't expect. Buried among the more wholesome attempts were two-legged dancing testicles, a "giant breast monster" and a four-legged, "phallic fornication machine," for starters."
What confuses me here is the line "something many users didn't expect." I mean, correct me if I'm being cynical, but I sort of assumed that anything that can be used for porn will be. Are these users Mormons? Or pathologically naive?
* Spore is a soon-to-be-released game in which, basically, you get to create your own life form and evolve it from a bacteria to something with a civilization.
** Creature Creator is a side project of Spore, which has been released and whereby people create their own creatures and can share them with the world.
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Failure
I'm a big failure for a number of reasons:
(1) Complete failure to update my blog in over a month. I'd like to claim that it's because I've been on safari tracking wildebeest and whatnot, but the truth is I've failed to have any really cool stories or thoughts in that time. Yes, it's true. I'm generally a food-consuming, excretion-producing waste of space.
(2) I apparently put a footnote-style * in my last post, and then failed to footnote anything. Nice one.
(3) I failed to give credit to Em for introducing me to Faildogs, also in that last post.
For all of the above, I can only offer this as a consolation prize for my massive suckage:
(1) Complete failure to update my blog in over a month. I'd like to claim that it's because I've been on safari tracking wildebeest and whatnot, but the truth is I've failed to have any really cool stories or thoughts in that time. Yes, it's true. I'm generally a food-consuming, excretion-producing waste of space.
(2) I apparently put a footnote-style * in my last post, and then failed to footnote anything. Nice one.
(3) I failed to give credit to Em for introducing me to Faildogs, also in that last post.
For all of the above, I can only offer this as a consolation prize for my massive suckage:
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
The die rolls on
The founder of D&D, Gary Gygax, died yesterday. Never fear, though; his legacy will never die. Witness, for example, the Level 8 Ogre Mage seeking a partner on Craigslist.*
The whole ad is just rife with hilarity, so I'll let you enjoy it without commentary (and oh, the strength of will it's taking me to not comment!).
Also: faildogs, the canine response to LOLcats, apparently.
The whole ad is just rife with hilarity, so I'll let you enjoy it without commentary (and oh, the strength of will it's taking me to not comment!).
Also: faildogs, the canine response to LOLcats, apparently.
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
This corporation is brought to you by dreams and rainbows
Go here and read the first line, under "Administrative Concepts' Mission."
Oh, Administrative Concepts. You had such lofty beginnings. And now you're just another employee leasing specialist offering risk management and payroll services. How the mighty have fallen.
Discussion Questions:
(1) How would you build on a vision? Discuss construction materials and address possible weaknesses in the foundation.
(2) What do soaring eagles have to do with employee leasing specialists? For bonus points, include a diagram.
(3) What does Administrative Concepts mean to you?
Oh, Administrative Concepts. You had such lofty beginnings. And now you're just another employee leasing specialist offering risk management and payroll services. How the mighty have fallen.
Discussion Questions:
(1) How would you build on a vision? Discuss construction materials and address possible weaknesses in the foundation.
(2) What do soaring eagles have to do with employee leasing specialists? For bonus points, include a diagram.
(3) What does Administrative Concepts mean to you?
Recent Events in my life, of middling to no interest
(1) Something that I said on the bus while talking to my brother about a video game, which in retrospect I realize made me sound like a crazy person and explains why everyone started staring at me: "Yeah, well just wait. Once you're out in space the military starts contacting you every two nanoseconds with some new emergency that only you can handle, like a biotic terrorist camp or a hostage situation or some rogue VI [virtual intelligence, for you non-nerds] that needs destroying."
(2) We really do have a full-on fridge thief. Last week he/she stole two full, unopened punnets of blueberries and a pint of yogurt. I'm serious. One day they were there, the next day... gone. I'm at a loss for how to proceed. When you make the kind of money that people in my industry make, and you work for an international company, in an office of over 200 people, who do you go to about your missing blueberries and yogurt?
(3) My fridge is broken, and has been for a week and a half now. There's some controversy about the warranty, I guess, which is part of the reason for the delay in fixing it. I'm honestly not that bothered, other than wondering how people stored food prior to fridges. Obviously they went grocery shopping everyday, and I think they generally had households large enough to finish the entire meal (i.e. less cooking for one). My officemate pointed out that they got food poisoning more often, too. Anyhow, I've been eating a lot of prepared salads for dinner as a result. Yum.
(4) Last night at a pub quiz, I was the only one in our group who figured out the answer to who created the periodic table: Mendeleev. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't riding on the high of remembering that for the rest of the night.
(2) We really do have a full-on fridge thief. Last week he/she stole two full, unopened punnets of blueberries and a pint of yogurt. I'm serious. One day they were there, the next day... gone. I'm at a loss for how to proceed. When you make the kind of money that people in my industry make, and you work for an international company, in an office of over 200 people, who do you go to about your missing blueberries and yogurt?
(3) My fridge is broken, and has been for a week and a half now. There's some controversy about the warranty, I guess, which is part of the reason for the delay in fixing it. I'm honestly not that bothered, other than wondering how people stored food prior to fridges. Obviously they went grocery shopping everyday, and I think they generally had households large enough to finish the entire meal (i.e. less cooking for one). My officemate pointed out that they got food poisoning more often, too. Anyhow, I've been eating a lot of prepared salads for dinner as a result. Yum.
(4) Last night at a pub quiz, I was the only one in our group who figured out the answer to who created the periodic table: Mendeleev. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't riding on the high of remembering that for the rest of the night.
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